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I did this impromptu show to fill in for a chapter that could not make it... enjoy and try not to laugh.

ONE MAN SHOW




someone once asked me about an embarrassing moment.
Not that there are many, but at least one does exist:

Dad decided that it was finally time that he took me on the road for a real driving lesson. At the time, I was a confident, handsome 12 yr old young man. Now, my dad had about four vehicles but only two worked well. Lets just say that they didn't break down as much as the others. So, dad decided to use this old hatchback truck which was my least favorite. It didn't have power steering, it was heavy, hard to turn and lacked that sex appeal that girls had come to identify with me. It kind of looked like a small garbage truck with a house on the back. But, I was game. I mean I'm from Chicago, so any ride beats no ride... anyday!

Ok, Im on the road and just barely seeing over the steering wheel, trying not to look illegal. I was impressive so dad had me get on the highway. I was a little nervous since it was my first time merging, but if you had looked at me... you would never know. Even back then I was kool under pressure. So, Im riding for about ten minutes in light traffic, when this drop-top BMW pulls up next to me. No less than five, "super-fine" high school-aged girls, singing and laughing... being young, care-free, pretty females. They looked over and started smiling at me... right! So,I look at the driver (who was the finest) and gave her that "million dollar smile," like... "I know you want me." Then, I looked over at dad and gave him that "nod" and he smiled at me because he knew what time it was. So, I turned back around and I promise you (no lie) all the girls were trying to flirt with me. Nothing new... I take it in stride. So, I put my hand up to my ear showing her the telephone sign. The driver was smiling hard as hell. Damn, I wanted that girl! She had that look in her eye like "you my future baby daddy!" She said yes and did the telephone sign back. Man, what! I could feel dad smiling, chest probably big, just proud! Like I hit the game winning shot!

Now, just when I was about to motion for her to pull over on the side of the road. I mean like something out of a movie... I heard a loud ripping, cracking noise. I didn't know what it was. All of a sudden, the hatch... and i do mean the whole hatch... came completely OFF the back of the truck and just flew in the air and started spinning. I couldn't believe it. It just started happening in slow motion. It came down hard on the expressway and just started beating up and slapping the hell out of all the cars behind me. I was like "Damn".... to myself...

Really, I was out there bad. I was underage, no license, driving a death trap. Somebody was probably gonna have to do some jail time....
my dad!

I was praying to God that those girls had not seen my whole truck come apart! That might ruin my first chance at love. ALL I REMEMBER was looking over and... seeing those girls, all five of them laughing hard as hell and pointing at me...

as I sped off!!!!

TRUE STORY



specifics:
Black/Italian mixture
6 ft 180lbs, athletic build...


I rarely indulge in excuses and my
smile has been described as "breathtaking!"



About me:
I am a people person, very socially oriented. I love to throw parties
and I make sure that everyone has a good time. I can be moved by
music and mesmorized by art (both my own and others). I play hard
and I work just as hard, if not harder. I read extensively to better
myself (in all aspects). I believe that I will be a great friend to many,
an excellent father to some and a beautiful husband to one. And to
those in my life, I will provide all the happiness that their
hearts can hold!!!



my ideal mate:
I really don`t seek her out. I enjoy life and acknowledge when
something exceptionally beautiful enters. She does not allow me
to under achieve. She does not need a man for anything but love.
This female makes me laugh almost as much as I make her laugh.
She has a very good heart that she gives freely. She smiles when
she thinks of me, often. There are no public arguements, no sexual
advances toward others and no... she will not let my friendship with
others interfere (unnecessarily). She respects "guys night out" as
much as I respect "girls night out." Oh and of course, she will make
some pretty babies!!!!

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