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Self Portait - June 2004

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Untitled Tears

Copyright 2001 james.ravenell.jr.



I saw you crying and fell into a daydream. I imagined I became the tears that flowed down the slopes of your face. And for as much as you wanted me not to exist, it was destiny that ushered me in. Each pore I passed told a story about you only to be heard by deafened ears. And I feared not what they told, only what you`d do to me had I ever spoke of them aloud. Never had I expected to be so close to you without gaiety hosting the experience. Still I was honored to feel your soul so completely that I thought I`d become one with myself. If this feeling I feel now that I`m with you is called love, I wish today became eternity that I might forever experience you and know it. (08/21/01)



Abstract
September 9, 2001 to April 23, 2002

Copyright 2002 James Ravenell Jr.
Taking an abstract of all things possible
I reflect back to dreams I dreamt while daydreaming about the life of my dreams

And on some sunny days, decisions I made, made the sun shine so much brighter on someSunday s
So that by Wednesday, if I was having a blue day
The week evened out into shades of gray
Colorful enough to let me know I was blessed anyway.

So to the Creator I prayed.
Not only for the health and safety of my friends and family
But also make a humble request for the rejuvenation of romance that had rendered itself dead in me

Though my eyes were blind
I received what was intended for me so swiftly and succinctly
That I mistook my blessings as being fortune and was riddled with complacency

I hadn t prepared myself to become me!

I created plastic rainbows
Just to find a pot of gold that sparkled when my eyes closed with the scent of fresh cut rose
Traveled down roads where the greener grass would grow
Until a leprechaun pointed out to me that my ideas had grown old

I was running naked in a place where no clothing could protect me from the cold.

Like a zoo-cat returning to the wilderness
I approached this re-acquaintance with romance with eagerness
That would make cupid shoot himself in the foot for his lackadaisicalness

I bathed myself in a pond that was saturated in fond memories of past loves
And etched out the feeling in tears on black-stained papyrus in a four figure hieroglyph

I believed in the institution of happiness again
And was staging myself to let my preparation meet my opportunity

Then it came to me!

I started tearing down the dams I built years before with no hands
That blocked my blessings and incarcerated my heart
Tied up ends that were loose and weakening the strongest links in my chain
Because of my indiscretion and good decisions that just went bad

Now I m back on course.

I chastise each line in my mind that goes astray or off-course in any way
That might bring back those darker days
And Igive thanks and praise and let the rays of the sol make my soul feel whole
And trusting and worthy

I m beginning to feel like me!

Then she!
She came into my world with such passion and force
That every element of who she was began to seep into my pores


She penetrated to the core of who I be
And made me see that she stood as a living example of a reason I should strive for a stronger me

And I agreed!
With her position on me that she spoke with unsaid words
She complemented my pride without compliments
And eradicated my fears with her quiet confidence

I and she were becoming we!

And I
Well I began to see that romance was too big to live inside of me
That when it was she and me, romance regained its vitality

So now we use the brick and mortar of our love to build the castle of our union
And we are learning to fortify our blessings with patience and understanding
Trust and truth were the foundations we built our home on
And now time and diligence will evolve we into a family

We took an abstract of all that was possible
And now our daydreams are coming true

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