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shinobiw...

Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted October 03, 2010

A guy goes on vacation to the Holy Land with his wife and mother-in-law.
The mother-in-law dies.
They go to an undertaker who explains that they can ship the body home
but that it will cost over $5000, where as they can bury her in the Holy Land for only $150.
The guy says, "We'll ship her home."
The undertaker asks, "Are you sure? That's an awfully big expense and we can do a very nice burial here."
The guy says, "Look!, 2000 years ago they buried a guy here and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can't take that chance."

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shinobiw...

Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted September 26, 2010

EROTIC DESIRES

©

My Instincts Govern,

I love her with such hatred.
Her seduction so subtle,
so blatantly cruel.
That angelic look
hints of the treacherous she devil.
Her eyes flash the heat of passion,
but she looks away,
her nipples erect,
as she sings of God’s glory.

What power this seductress wields,
hot lava pours from her lips,
men melt
and I am among those consumed.
She smiles and honey drips from her mouth,
and men forgive her brutal tease
and I too fall mesmerized at her feet.

Between her thighs
the burn of desire flavors the air,
she speaks of love and virtue,
and men struggle to maintain composure.
My eyes drop from her eyes
down to firm breasts.
My conscience scolds,
my instincts govern.
I want this virgin,
and I am not alone.

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shinobiw...
Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted September 08, 2010

WINTER CLASSES FOR MEN AT THE LEARNING CENTER FOR ADULTS
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS,
CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.

Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays --- Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 2
The Toilet Paper Roll --- Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.

Class 3
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and
Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub? --- Group Practice.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper
and The Floor ---
Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.

Class 5
After Dinner Dishes --- Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
at 7:00 PM

Class 6
Loss Of Identity --- Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM

Class 7
Learning How To Find Things --- Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.

Class 8
Health Watch --- Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 9
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost --- Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.

Class 10
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.

Class 11
Learning to Live --- Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing .
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined

Class 12
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.

Class 13
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy --- Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late.
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.

Class 14
The Stove/Oven --- What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined.

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.

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shinobiw...
Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted August 11, 2010

The first man had married a woman from West Virginia. He bragged that he had told his wife to do all the dishes and clean the house. He said that it took her a couple of days, but on the third day he came home to a clean house and the dishes were all washed and put away.

The second man had married a woman from Ohio. He bragged that he had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes, and the cooking. He told the men that the first day he didn't see any results, but by the next day it was better, and on the third day, his house was clean, the dishes were done, and he had a huge dinner on the table.

The third man had married a Louisiana girl! He boasted that he told her his house was to be cleaned, dishes washed, the cooking done and laundry folded. And this was all her responsibility. He said the first day he didn't see anything and the second day he didn't see anything but by the third day some of the swelling had gone down so he could see a little out of his left eye.

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shinobiw...
Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted July 19, 2010

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shinobiw...
Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted June 28, 2010

69

We are showered and flowered our bodies with scent
No kissing goes missing in our foreplay time spent
Nibbling your stubbles with the tenderest licks
While you suckle my cockles we are a 9 and a 6

I turn you beneath me and spin nipples to tits
And put my piece into a place I know fits
I’m well lubricated the friction is moot
You get what you came for and holler and hoot

I start out quite gently then pick up the rhythm
As your breast sway I do my best to stay with them
Changing the angles and lifting your limbs
And finding the places your face says their in

We are Cumming together I spit and you squirt
Our bodies are euphoric no pains or no hurts
We scream out our pleasure and linger its note
Then spill so much fluid we are starting to float

Then soak in the semen and liquid we share
Aloft in our dreaming with no worry or care
I pull my weight off you and reach for a towel
We lay there together and smile for awhile

Our after life glowing just woman and man
This getting together was such a good plan

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shinobiw...
Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted June 18, 2010

IN ANY LANGUAGE...LOVE IS LOVE!

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shinobiw...
Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted February 04, 2010

PASSION...

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shinobiw...
Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted January 04, 2010

Locks

Come to me,
Lay with me,
I want to take you all in,
Deeply,

Steal your air,
Smell your skin,
Tempting in silent darkness,
Bare.

Hover over you,
Skim the rims
Of your cavern,
Fair.

Detect for what you protect,
Your treasure,
As I dare to explore for pleasure.

And if I wish for entry,
It will be granted,
You can resist no more,

The locks to your door
Grow weak.

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shinobiw...
Male, 48, Greensboro, NC

Posted December 11, 2009

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EROTIC DESIRES