Dolcenera

Indecisive.

You could definitely say that I am indecisive when I ordera meal. I feel compellled to examine the entire menu before I make a choice: I don't want to miss out on something truly unique and special. However, when it comes to my relationships, when it comes to who I want to share my life with, at the age of 38 years old, I know exactly what I want and I have no problems saying so. After all, if I don't say what it is that I want, how can anyone ever give it to me? By the same token, if you don't tell me what it is that you want, how can I give it to you?

If even you don't know...

What the hell can I do? Believe you when you say that you don't know and wait for you to figure it out? Guess that this is just "code" for something else? None of the above? The impulsive Karma Slicing Alpha Female inside of me screams "NEXT!!!" Who has time to play around with people who don't know what the hell it is they want?

Nothings irks me more than men who are "confused"

The dating process is the way I have chosen to determine if someone is right for me, but that presupposes honesty, integrity and self-awareness. It mandates that two people simply try to be sincere and honest with one another. It is predicated on two people who know what it is that they want, but when one of them is confused...well that just sort of screws things up doesn't it?

I am not a mind reader, nor am I a psychologist. Goodness, say what you mean, mean what you say! Know what the hell it is you want BEFORE you go shopping.

In matters of the heart, are we really comparing spec sheets? Don't people just know? One way or the other, isn't it obvious when someone is or is not right for you? In my experience, when I am not sure of someone, it generally means that I am not into them or that they are not for me. My confusion in the past has been indicative of my own cowardice because I did not want to hurt someone's feelings. I was too immature to realize that the bitter truth is always better than a sweet lie.

There have been situations where I did not initially appreciate someone who later became someone I fell madly in love with , but even in those cases, that time period was relatively short. It didn't take me years to figure that out.

So what gives with these relationships that go on for years while one person tries to get "unconfused" about whether the other person is right for them? On the surface it seems to be a demoralizing situation for the person who is waiting.

I simply do not understand men who don't know what they want.

Isn't that just "code" for "not you" ?

I choose not to wait. I deserve someone who is as clear about what they want as I am. I can't imagine what compelling set of circumstances would mandate that I wait around for someone else to recognize the dynamic, intelligent, compassionate and sexy woman that I am. Code or no code it is obvious that they do not. I am a karma slicing alpha female. I do not wait. Recognize now.

He is a protector: Intelligent/dominant/self assured. Something about him makes me feel safe. His aura is secure, and peaceful. He is sound in his spirituality and complimentary to my own peaceful spirit. Open-minded, he is supportive of my Buddhist practice.

He knows what he wants and is looking for a dynamic and sensual woman to share his life with. Love is a first place priority in his life. His work is important to him, but he longs to devote the best part of himself to love. His priorities are reflected in the amount of time he spends with me. Together our love is synergetic, our adoration is mutual.

He is multi-dimensional: lover, friend, professional, handyman, mechanic, computer geek. I like men that are multi-dimensional, because I am too. I can change my own tires and hang my own pictures but I love it when a man does it for me.

Whoever he is, however he may be I accept him exactly as he is in this moment, he need not do anythinge else to have my love forever.

His physical expression is self-less and mind blowing.

The beauty of dating is that it can definitely help you to know what you like and don't like, and based on my recent limited experience, I can tell you very clearly what I am not. I have always thought that I was NOT a high-maintenance woman in the sense that I am relatively laid back as far as almost everything is concerned-with the exception of love. When it comes to love, I am extremely demanding: straight up Ultra High Maintenance.

Love merits being my number one priority, it's reflected in the amount of time I am willing to devote to the man I choose as my partner and my family. If he is in a relationship with me, love will be his number one priority as well.

I am NOT the kind of woman who just KNOWS how my man feels about me, I need to see it, hear it and feel it, often. The man in my life knows how I feel about him, because he will see it, hear it and feel it often.

I am NOT the long-suffering type content to "wonder" about the feelings my partner may have for me. I cannot be put on hold, warm or simmer while he figures out what his values are.

If love, passion and sex are not a priority for him, then I am NOT the one.

I don't know what inspires people to pursue romantic relationships and then not make love a priority, but...

amazingly enough I don't give a shyt

NEXT!

I was born a pessimist and the best definition of a pessimist that I have heard is that we pessimists are actually optimists, well informed. That describes me perfectly, I am an extremely reflective person who prefers to study all angles of a problem prior to making a decision. What I am learning from the realm of positive thinking and the mystical is that I do not know everything. The ability of any being to undertand the world around him is limited to our ability to perceive and interpret and science has already proved that there are things that cannot be perceived with our 5 senses....what else is out there? Letting go of my "perceived grip on reality" has allowed me to discover so much more.