My name is Gary Lloyd James. I was born in the country of
Jamaica where I was taught some of life?s most intriguing lessons.
My childhood was filled with interesting encounters that put me in
a place where I would have no choice but to believe in God.
Throughout my childhood I realized that I had a special concern for
the less fortunate in our society and hoped that one day I would be
able to do something to make life a little better for those who
felt they could not go any further. I moved to the United States to
be with my lovely wife to whom I have the awesome pleasure to be
married to for the past eleven years. She has been a God-send and
has kept me grounded and has supported me in by many endeavors. On
July 18, 2004 I received what I call the ?gift of poetry?. I
emphasize the word ?gift? because that is what I believe it to be.
I had absolutely no interest in poetry until the night of July 18,
2004 when I had a dream of a woman being abused by her spouse and
that scene caused something inside me to snap. I rose up the next
morning with this burden on my mind wanting so badly to do
something, anything, to help these women who are facing this
situation on a daily basis. When I got to work that afternoon I was
looking for some information on the internet when I came across a
contest for poetry and I said to myself, ?Poetry?? That may be a
way to express these strong convictions I have regarding the abuse
of our women. So I went to this poetry website and started to write
the first line of ?A Woman?s Tears? which won the Editor?s Choice
Award from Poetry.com for 2004.
I proceeded to write a second poem, after which I was consumed by
poetry in such a way that I ended up writing 100 poems in 3 months
and pursued the goal of publishing my book, ?Untied Feelings? which
has received rave reviews from Prof. G. Bembry from Bloomfield
College in Bloomfield New Jersey. Since then I have been driven by
the desire to speak out against domestic violence in our society.
My objective is to bring awareness of domestic violence to another
level. I have no doubt in my mind that this burden in my heart was
the very reason that God has blessed me with this ability.
I will continue this quest until men realize how precious and
vitally important women are to our society. The thought of a thirty
plus year old woman cowering like a twelve year old child before a
man who claims to love her, just cuts at the very fiber of my
being. Poetry has allowed me to look at women in a new light after
seeing life from their perspective. When I stepped back and took a
look at my very own wife and saw how she operates, how she does our
taxes, works two jobs, cooks our dinner, does the laundry, leaves
one job and brings our daughter to cheerleading practice. Then,
coming back home to the computer to start her other job, revising
our daughter?s homework, editing my book. When going on vacation,
the way she packs our suitcase without forgetting a single item,
has left me, at times, speechless, and I would say to myself how
could I ever raise my hands against a woman that does all that and
more? And this is the message I would like to get out to the world
to these men who do not feel that they can be a man until they have
there female companion terrified of being in their presence. I hope
this dream of bringing awareness of domestic violence through
poetry, T Shirts, and other mediums will be the start of a new day
where women and men will speak out on behalf of the millions of
women who are living their lives in constant fear.
For more information about me and my efforts to end domestic
violence, and violence against women. Please see
www.garyjamespoetry.com link below.
My new website is now active.
Please visit www.PoetStation.8m.com
These were the words uttered by a seventeen year-old young lady
after reading my book and seeing the vivid detail in which I told
the stories of abused women through poetry. She looked at her
mother unable to believe that a man was capable of this kind of
writing. I will make no apologies because I believe that this
revelation was given to me for a reason. I have also taken into
consideration that this issue is unwelcome in most arenas. So armed
with my only tool, poetry, and with strength that can only come
from the creator, I have taken up this banner to speak up and out
about this evil that is killing our women. I must admit that this
has been a daunting task, riddled with so many layers of pain and
depression that it is going to take a tremendous effort to make a
difference. To my well-wishers, I thank you for your support. For
those of you on the sidelines who think my speaking out is just a
phase and that it, too, shall pass, I am sorry to disappoint you
but I am just getting started. For me, this issue has become too
big to ignore. I can no longer sit by and continue to hear about so
many women being beaten and murdered and not speak up. Yes, it?s
true, there is a lot of research that has to be conducted, but I
believe a better way of educating the public is possible. I may be
at a disadvantage because I never had the misfortune of being a
part of that kind environment. That is why it is so important that
a man?s voice is heard on this issue that affects all of us as a
nation.
To step into the shoes of these women and see their struggle to
survive is amazing in itself. Normally this subject is left to the
experts, but there are only so many that deal with this issue. I
have since realized that I will not go through life comfortably
unless I give in to the force that has gotten a hold on me. In my
future writings, it is my hope that I will be a force that will
help to save the lives of many abused women. Along with the many
people who share my views, I will make a serious effort to dig deep
beneath the surface of some of these abusers to find out why women
are such targets for their anger. At the same time I hope to reach
out to these women to let them know that a better day is coming and
to somehow speak a word of encouragement that will ignite the flame
that once burned so brilliantly. Alone, I can only do so much, but
I will do all that is my power because I believe it is the thing to
do. And like the young lady said, ?After all, I?m only a man.?
Email: gman2tall@aol.com
www.garyjamespoetry.com
What's New with Gary
 Just wanted to check in and to let my fans know
what is going on with my endeavors to speaking out against domestic
violence. Allow me to take this opportunity to formally welcome you
to my group. I do apologize for not updating my page
as often as i should. I am also in the process of streamlining my
page meaning, anyone who is not communicating for a long period of
time will be removed from the group. Domestic Violence is a very
serious issue and I do not want to waste people's time and i surly
do not want anyone to waste mine. So if you are serious about being
a member of my group please continue your communications. Please
visit my new website to see my progress on my new documentary "
Tears Behind Society's Wall" Where I will be interviewing women of
domestic violence.
You can also leave your comments about the website and any
suggestions you might have. Again thank you for your continued
support. Please remember to sent me a note if you are
interested in staying an active member, I am notÂ
asking for money just a strong group of people who want to see
domestic violence become a thing of the past.
Thank you
Gary Lloyd James
I wrote this poem for all those women who are starting over
after an abusive relationship
After The Abuse
It?s been many years since a man has placed a hand on me
Visions of the abuse have become a distant memory
All of my fears have been laid to rest
It?s been years since the last time I woke up in a cold sweat
Finding someone new, I never thought was possible
It?s a far cry from fighting with my ?ex? and holding the knife
handle
Now I must take this new relationship for what it is worth
I can?t live my life thinking I will always end up hurt
With my daughter as my number one priority
It is because of her that I must take authority
Of this life of mine, that I now share with her
So it?s my responsibility to stand in harms way, as her mother
There has got to be a few good men left
I am tired of going through life holding my breath
I am tired of getting up every morning feeling depressed
Blaming myself for being in this mess
All this I must put behind me to concentrate on my new man
Someone that listens to me and tells me he understands
Someone who knows where I am coming from
Someone who has accepted me, for who I am
Someone who?s love I believe to be true
Someone to spend my life with, after the abuse
WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING ABOUT THE CD // STONE PILLOW
Excellent!!!
Gary's book is a very powerful medium that highlights a social ill
in our society.
The book gives vivid details of women in the middle of their
battles with
domestic violence.
Jeff Sarge: DJ of the Reggae Schoolroom radio program On WFMU 91.1
fm
"Gary James' well-crafted and moving poetry captures the painfully
honest voice of the women who have been silenced and offers
illumination to the men who are their abusers."
Shelley Grodner Seidenstein, Director of Kids Who Care, Inc. and
coauthor of
Power Tools & Rituals: Offbeat Crafts For Women.
"I have known Min. Gary James for almost three years. As his
teacher, mentor and friend, I have seen him grow in his compassion
for the helping women deal with Domestic Violence...He is sincere,
and an honest caring Black man, as we fight against this ugly
social problem. He uses his understanding of his Christian faith in
a loving and creative manner through his CD. There are very few
Black men today who are standing up against this problem. We should
honor Min. Gary James as a model of compassion and caring for women
all over the world."
Dr. Glenmore Bembry, Jr.
Pastor, Trinity Baptist Church and Professor at Bloomfield College,
Bloomfield NJ
I wrote this piece to lend a voice to the struggles that our single
mothers face on a daily basis. I hope these words will encourage
them to hold on and know that their work has not gone unnoticed
A Day in the Life of a Single Mother
She wakes up with so much on her mind
Everything is always rushed, she can never find enough time
She never does only one thing, she must always multitask
Like combing her daughter's hair with her right hand, and with her
left, she fixes breakfast
She, too, had dreams of a husband and a complete family
But her dreams were placed on hold because she was left holding two
babies
Though many lies and the deceit she has gotten used to
Still she has two kids to look after, and the rest of her life to
live through
She has gotten sick and tired of the question, "Where is the
Father"?
As if she was the one who pushed him out of the picture
She tries her best not to become hard and bitter
By making sure she got rid of every single one of his letters
She was told that she isn't the only single mother out there
There are days when she just stands by the window and stare
Sometimes she doesn't have time to eat, only a small bite she will
grab
Her daughter would say to her, "Mommy, your eyes are growing
bags"
She's come a long way and still has a ways to go
Her children are depending on her for a lesson in life that they
will have to know
Always the consummate mother making sure they do things right
So they will never know what a day in the life of a single mother
is like
