My Dearest Love,
Regardless of how slow the pendulum swings as you are away from me, the seconds on the clock seems to extend into tiny portions of lifetimes. I sit here in this empty house with only sweet memories of you to keep me warm, starring at your baby pictures, suppressing the tears because of that baby God created years ago would be the woman that I would love.
Each day away from you have made me realize how lonely I am without you and now I thank God for you! Knowing that when you come home, we'll never spend another night apart from each other. Why? Because you are my air, my space, my moon and my fireplace that keeps me alive, free, guided and warm from the struggles of life.
My Sweet Goddess, your tears of the past have only baptized my soul, purifying me from the gangster scars of who I use to be just to bring out the new man designed to love you. So thank you for accepting me and placing your battered heart in my hands and as I place band aids of true love around it, may the healing of my commitment to you restore that essence in you that will last forever. Because this engagement of ours is merely a chapter in the novel of our journey as lovers, until the manuscript of love is complete in our eternal marriage. I know that our marriage will be a sign, a sign of what love is suppose to look like.
Why? Because you have giving me a reason to love, a purpose to wake up and run into your room and kiss your soft lips, because I don't only have you, I have paradise! The essence of any man is his ability to probe his own heart to find the light within, and his struggle to embrace the bitter sweet realities of being a man after discovering that light.
I lay up in the late hours of the night thinking about you, knowing that the pain I feel is like medicine treating those places in me that was once wounded by the aftermath of my past lifestyle. The gangster in me fights with the Angel in me, both playing tag a war with the little ego I have left.
However, I have found my balance, you. The very thing in life that every man hopes for, a woman to love him despite the negativities and anger attached to his personality. I know that God is ever present in my life, bringing opportunities that pushes me closer to that door of success and true freedom (mental/spiritual) that awaits. Now that I have become your Black Prince, it is only right that I give you the best of myself, my essence, that secret part of me that makes you fall in love with me when you first laid eyes on me...
Yes, I tried to fight my own heart to not fall in love with you, but your presence in my life every day only created a desire that I could no longer live without! Yes, you gave me that, a chance. So I dry my eyes after reading your letters to me, knowing that you deserve so much, and dammit, I'm going to do everything in my power to make you happy...
Because I love you, and love you, and love you...
Love,
Your Man
