chatha27 The one that got away... Never really had a genuine friend.. - June 29, 2010 add/view comments (0)

http://www.blackplanet.com/chatha27/

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I am not ready for love nor am I ready to be committed. I am barely committed to myself. The only thing I have ever been committed to was trying to please other people.. Why? Well your looking at a woman who has been tainted throughout her whole life. Lifetime of sacrifice for nothing, pain for pleasure, mental and physical abuse. A long time it took me to realize that human nature comes with human error. People make mistake and its up to you to forgive them and yourself. I have lived a long time with insecurities, anxiety, and phobias. I lived an intense life of fear that all was to get me, hurt me, and vanish what I put into our lives at the moment after they were done with me.. Whether it be conversation, relationship, dinner whatever... I know your thinking what is wrong with this woman.. The question is: What is wrong with the people who I trusted in life that have harmed me so much to bring to be this way...I have lead a life of what others thought I should lead... It took me 29 years to realize its not me its them.. It took me to realize that its true we dont really know the key to success but the key to failure is always trying to please others..I must be honest I am in Love I am committed and his name is JESUS!! Any questions...

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