My name is Gina, I am God's woman in every way, the gift I have been given and knew that was what I was supposed to do is worship, I have learned to put God first in all things, not that I always get it right but I always try to do right not in man's eyes but God's. I love to take walks in the park and sit by water, streams, ponds, lakes and write or just listen to nature around me, there is a beauty in just silence....
As I look at all that I have been through and all that has came to steal, kill and destroy my love that was given before I was even born, I realize that I am here at this moment to uncover what has been covered to conceal where I have been and how I came through. After having real love, in it's purest form, unconditional and edifying to the essential need of my existence this day I release...
Another testimony
The abuse my mind, heart, and soul kept me bound for so many years, I would cry tears that could fill a river, needing to know love had it's place in time for me...I loved and was never really loved, I gave beyond what I needed only to find myself empty and unfulfilled. Loving and caring for those who were closest to me, my friends and some of my family, only to find myself on the outside looking in and used up and cast aside. Hiding the pain behind a smile, crying deep within, starved for love, for a touch and for my life to begin. I stood for so many years alone not wanting to feel the emptiness and void, until one day I heard a word that change the very dimensions of what I viewed and valued, no longer struggling to apply, but walking to achieve and love me. Work on me, who I was and where I have been....cannot and will never dictate who I have become..living in this moment, I would not be who I am, without going through what I have been through. The night that comes to mind that I knew my life was not my own, was the day I ended up in the hospital, two stab wounds to the chest, by a knife I brought as a gift to the man I lived to love. My children's father, the physical wound was one that would heal, it missed my lung by one fourth of an inch, the shame I felt within, what did I do? what could I do to make it right? I held my head up and forgave and walked daily with my heart so broken, it would take all that was in me not to cry, not to let the brokenness show on the outside, covering up so no one would know I was dying inside. Who could love me? I could love me, because God loves me, and know one told me that, no one taught me to love me, they taught me to be what they needed me to be..Until one day after my daughter was born I could not allow her to grow up thinking that it was okay for any man to treat her that way, So I took a stand and became love to me.. yes it felt strange to look at myself and see something good, intelligent and precious in me..but daily I did so my life depended on making a change to move beyond the conditions that had me bound, from childhood until that moment..I never knew in me love could be found. I find peace in loving the way God has kept me. My mind, body, and soul is to be loved and for me to give love I had to let go of the first wound in life.
I have no regrets and hold only love within me.
For the ones who feel the void and emptiness inside, I pray that you know there is nothing greater than the love God has placed in you..that filling the void is connecting with the one made you..life will began when your heart finds peace and forgiveness with the first wound that created the issue that caused you to cover up, the pain and shame that rendered you bound to hide.
Some friends I had to let go of, some family I have to love from a distance to keep on loving them, however I never give up love for a bitter root, to do so I would up life and nothing is worth that death. So I pray that your heart be tender and good things come forth to release a manifestation of the goodness God has for you...
Forgetting those things which are behind me , I am reaching forth to those things which are before me, I press towards the mark for prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus Philippians 3:13, 14
