OOPS...sorry to disappoint, I'm actually an intellectual. Fooled by the eye candy? Good. Now it's time to put on your reading glasses and learn something new.
NOTES ONLY. No friend invites, no group invites, no IMs, just NOTES!!! Scroll down to the bottom and write clearly. If you went to school, you should know how to read and write. No dumb notes. Challenge yourself.
A perfect note:
1. An introduction: Hi, my name is (fill in the blank).
2. I'm writing to let you know (I think you're a snob, beautiful, intelligent, etc.)
3. Additionally, I hope you don't ask for information that is already on my page (for instance a dumb question is where in NY do I live??? I live in North Jersey, in the NY Metro. No, not Newark; I live in north, north, north Jersey--Um think George Wash Bridge. The best part of Jersey, heehee).
4. Scroll down and leave a note at the bottom of the page....if you are brave enough.
Thank you and Enjoy My Page...Welcome...a taste of Southern Hospitality with a side of Jersey
As you can see and feel, this page is different. I hope to promote dignity, intellectualism, and individualism and to do so, is to live as an example. Many members on BP are a disgrace to their parents and their culture, due to their promiscuous, ignorant, classless behavior. Fortunately, as W.E.B. Du Bois proclaimed, there will be a "talented tenth" that will rise above to make progress. I look forward to connecting with other members who strive to be better than the status quo. WE HAVE TO DO BETTER AND BE BETTER TO SURVIVE.
I have so much to say, so much love to give to everyone. I do appreciate the friend requests, but I will not reply to them; it's a waste of time.. I definitely PREFER notes sent to me. PLUS, I DO RESPOND TO ALL INTELLIGIBLE NOTES. IF I DON`T WRITE YOU BACK, TAKE IT PERSONALLY BECAUSE I READ ALL MY NOTES. ADDITIONALLY, I WON`T LOOK AT YOUR PAGE UNLESS YOU WRITE ME A WELL WRITTEN NOTE. GIVE ME YOUR BRAIN, BECAUSE I DON`T CARE HOW YOU LOOK.
FYI--Here are the stats: I`m 5`8", mocha-coloured, curvaceous, all that, and to add to that...brighter than the July sun (and a bit too serious). I reside in a nice pretty place in Bergen County, Northern Jersey. Yes, it's home to celebrities, visionaries, and shopaholics. My Christian name is NOT "najaca," pronounced "Ni-yah-kah," and it simply means "first born." My really common Christian name is...well, I`ll tell you later. Hint: its a Latin-derived name that means, "true image." I do have a 156 IQ. The benefit of being intelligent, is that I am able to take in the whole picture in every situation I encounter. I see the beauty first in everyone and everything. However, I can see the blackness in people`s hearts quite easily. Is this intelligence, or is it actually a high intuition? I hate numbers, but I know truth, therefore, I can score high on just about any test given to me. God only knows.
BUILDING A LARGE VOCABULARY AND USING THE PROPER GRAMMAR to express each of your emotions will not only save your butt, it will free your soul.--Me, Oct, 2005
HAVEN'T I BEEN TALKING ABOUT THE TALENTED TENTH???
WEB Du Bois stated over 100 years ago, there will be a "talented tenth" that will rise, that will excel and succeed. He was right. We now have a Black president.
"The Talented Tenth ... must be made leaders of thought and missionaries of culture among their people ... Education must not simply teach work - it must teach Life."
-W.E.B. Du Bois (1903)
YES WE CAN, AND WE DID!!! THANK GOD, WE FINALLY DID IT!!!
Yeah, I'm on myspace. Here are the links:
http://www.myspace.com/thetrut haboutroni
On Having Mixed Heritage
I don't like the term African-American. I think many Black people who immigrated to the United States straight from Africa or the West Indies, do not love the term. It is a term that is supposed to bring Blacks in America together, but the term Black is all we needed. I don't indentify with the term African-American.
Lets be real, my father is Jamaican (with some Chinese roots), and my mother's family is Black, Scottish, and Cherokee (identified in Census records as "mulatto). Therefore, African-American, isn't entirely applicable. But if I have a mixed heritage, why do I like to be called Black? Because it includes a hell of a lot more people and unites us with a sense of being that surpasses being from Africa. There are a lot more Black people in the world and they all aren't from Africa. Whether or not people are ashamed of having dark skin, there are plenty more of us than anybody else.
I observe Latinos, that I feel are going through an identity crisis. The cling onto a whiteness that doesn't necessarily cling onto them. They push away the blackness, although its something that they fight with everyday. There is a discomfort with being around too many Blacks, because they realize that they are not too different from us. And its frightening. They haven't been enriched by Black history the way we have been, who have been identified as "African American." I feel its important that the awareness of Black history, would enrich and empower the lives of Latinos. If I hear one more time that I look Dominican, I really want to tell someone off. I've been to South America, and I promise you, there are plenty of people that would blend into my own Black family, without a second look.
Culturally speaking, I grew up with my own identity crisis. Having a Jamaican father and an American mother made life different and interesting. I don't really have a strong Jamaican identity or a strong American identity. This is due to the many conflicting views of customs and ettiquette and taste in music and food. So growing up, I drew from not only my Jamaican and American roots, but I also kept the same openess to all of the cultures here in Jersey. So I was influenced by the cultures that surrounded me, which were Jewish, Italian, and Latino. As result, I know so much about these cultures, that I don't really separate myself from any of them. I speak Spanglish most of the time, I eat Jewish foods (Bagels, pickels, matzo, deli foods) and know most of the holidays, and I mostly cook and eat Italian.
So, the result of being a Jersey girl, was just as an influence as being Jamaican, or my mothers mixed heritage. Culturally, I do feel a need to include all these cultures into my everyday life. But being Black, is something else. Being Black is something that faces me in the mirror. I look and see a brown-skinned girl with nappy hair. I look at many people, that have either the brown skin or dark nappy hair or both, and I know, in someway their lives are affected by the way other people perceive them to be.
"Biracial", Latino, Middle Eastern, Indian and the other brown/nappy headed people have been persecuted not for their culture but for these traits. Instead of going into denial and hiding behind culture, has actually made it more difficult to unite and fight the superficiality of judging people on skin color and hair texture. We can celebrate our culture, but lets not forget to look into the mirror and face the reality of our Blackness.
I applaud Barack Obama, Boris Kodjoe, and Halle Berry. They are multiracial people that acknowledge their Blackness. To identify with one's Blackness first, is essential in seeking an authentic, rich identity. Culture is different than individualism. And individually speaking, its important to look in the mirror and accknowledge and identify with the reflection that we see. To look towards other Black folk who have been through the struggle is empowering. So stop the BS and lets truly embrace our Blackness first, then we can finally celebrate our mixed heritage in a meaningful way.
NO!
My page is not a dating profile. Nope, it really isn't. BUT the big reason why is the quality of guys on this site is pathetic. Years ago, not everyone had a computer. Mostly college kids. Now, the people on BP look like they are on parole or about to go back to jail.
1. No, I don't want you if you wear a du-rag.
2. No, I don't want you if you are holding a stack of cash--have you ever heard of a bank??? Yuck.
3. No gold teeth.
4. If you are unable to write a paragraph with correct punctuation - I don't want you either.
5. Why are there men that want to look so bad and ragged? Stop looking so poor and tacky. Yuck. Why is it so hard to look clean, intelligent, and polished? WOW. It's sad. All I can say, I'll never be desperate enough to give you nasty trashy guys any play. Yuck. Take a shower, buy some new clothes and read a book. I've never seen such a trifling amount of men in one spot.
6. Additionally, the red, purple, royal blue. purple, satin, pimp suits are pathetic. If you wear a hat, it's extra pathetic. Those suits scream low-class.
7. Additionally, no music careers...no production, rapping, djing, promoting. Come on now. Get a clue; school is the way, not music. That is a hobby.
Okay, I'm a stuck up snob from Bergen County. Sorry, but not a chance in hell will I bring a man with a du-rag, gold teeth, sloppy clothes around MY FAMILY. Yuck. If I wanted a bum, I can pick one up at the homeless shelter.
Ain't Sayin' She's Gold Digger; but she AIN'T MESSIN' WITH A BROKE ...
Seriously, I don't mess with broke guys. I'm not only not messing with broke guys, I'm not going to mess with guys who aren't successful in their careers. No body ever talks about WHY women won't date a broke guy, but I will.
Successful men know what they want in life. They know how to plan, they take responsibility for their actions, and they are at a good place in their lives. That's the reason I'm checking them out and ignoring the broke dudes. I have everything too; i don't need a man to open his wallet. Period.
When you see a man getting engaged; its for a good reason--he's happy with how is life is going. He's confident about his career path, he can pay his bills, and he is satisfied with the person he is. Therefore, he's wants to share his happiness with another person.
When I see a man that doesn't want to commit, or pretends to be committed but still playing around with other women...he's not so happy about his own life. There's nothing wrong with this, it just means he needs time to get his life together and doesn't want to complicate his life. I do these guys a favor by leaving them alone. I'm not going to deal with someone who is not clear about what they want or isn't comfortable with the progress of their life.
OK, so theres a successful guy in one corner. Or is he? He makes a decent salary, he's educated, but still playing around. Okay, there's an explanation for this: he's damaged and/or cautious. He fought hard to get to this point of his life, and is afraid of being taken advantaged of and be made a fool. He could have been a geek and never got dates until the success came into play. Or he's never really been in a good relationship. Well, I also leave these men alone.
I'm no psychiatrist and I'm not into manipulation.
Here's the other extreme. An ex of mine, a millionaire and incredibly successful, was anxious to get married. I learned from the situation, that I wasn't ready to get married. I didn't feel comfortable leaving my life, to move into his world. I learned he didn't want to necessarily want to marry me because he loved ME. He simply was ready to get marry to a female. If I was a gold digger, I would have jumped at this opportunity...but the ultimatum that came into play, freaked me OUT.
So, success is not tangible; it's a mindset that I look for. I look for certain values, and certain behaviors that show to me, that this man is secure with who he is, and he shares similar values in life. Broke guys...so many issues....they need to focus on their lives first, before getting involved with a woman like me
ENTERTAINERS WITH AN EDUCATION
It's funny, Bossip just posted a comment about rappers with college degrees. People think that many of these entertainers are ignorant, but in fact are educated (or attempted college). Here's a log of educated black artists and their Alma Maters (you go 'head, now!):
Denzel Washington - Fordham University
John Legend - University of Pennsylvania
Ryan Leslie - Harvard University
Gabrielle Union- University of Nebraska
Jill Scott - Temple University
Flavor Flav - Adelphi University
Erykah Badu - Grambling State
Master P - University of Houston
Amerie-Georgetown University
Faith Evans - Fordham University
Sanaa Lathan - University of California - Berkeley, Yale School of Drama
Taye Diggs - Delaware State University, Syracuse University
Keisha Knight Pulliam- Spellman College
Aisha Tyler-Dartmouth College
Common -Florida A&M University
Ludacris - Georgia State University
Joy Bryant - Yale University
Henry Simmons - Franklin Pierce College
Talib Qweli - New York University
Taraji Henson - Howard University
Blair Underwood - Carnegie Mellon University
Boris Kodjoe- Virginia Commonwealth University
The Dream - John Jay College
Keri Hilson - Emory University
Macy Gray - University of Southern California
Anthony Anderson - Howard University
Sean Combs - Howard University
Tatyana Ali - Harvard University
Toni Braxton - Bowie State University
Sistah Souljah - Rutgers University ( My school :) )
Sean Paul - University of Technology
Don Cheadle - Cal. Institute of the Arts
Regina King - University of Southern California
Tracee Ellis Ross - Brown University
Morris Chestnut - University of California - Northridge
Jill Marie Jones - Texas Women's University
Kerry Washington - The George Washington University
Eva Marcille Pigford - Clark Atlanta University
Syleena Johnson - Drake University
Raheem DaVaughn - Coppin State University
The List Will continue....get your school on...
Dynamic Living
The more ethnically rich the better. I think that's why my mother married a Jamaican and that's why I would much rather marry someone that isn't exactly like me. And I have dated a variety of men from all over the world. I've dated doctors, deejays, artists, business men, lawyers, firemen, cops, and other guys. To date the same sort of person all the time, how boring.
Some people work to stay within the lines. They wear the same clothes as everybody else, they listen to the same music, and they listen to their friends on how to live their lives. Boring as hell.
I love my life, the way every day is different and how adaptable I can be. I can be comfortable in the hood, I can be comfortable in the suburbs, and I can go just about anywhere and be alright. Can you adjust or are you rigid? Hopefully you have expanded your life to include art, travel, music and food of different cultures. I hate going to some peoples houses and before you walk in, you know you're getting fried chicken, mac and cheese, greens and potato salad. Its time to mix it up a little, dont you think?
It is a gift to live in the NYC area. I love the ability to travel a few blocks and be exposed to so much. When I need a scarf, I can go to an Indian store. When I want West Indian food, there are plenty of restaurants to go (or my father cooks it). When I need good Italian food, it's here. Its all here and I love it.
I don't know how people live anywhere else (except Paris and Montreal). I love it here, I hope to die here. I %#&@$!ing hate Atlanta and the South and the rest of the country. This is the center of the world. Period.
Losing my mother...
Well, my mother has passed away recently, April 28, 2009 at a young age, Ironically my grandmother also left the world in April, at an early age as well. So, my life continues now without my mom physically present in my life. I will miss my mom very much, because she was more of a big sister to me, rather than a mom. We talked about everything, and she is the reason I read at 3 years old, and I write the way I do. It's a hard thing to go through. Right now, Im going through the easy part, but I believe the hardest part of her death is that no one will understand me as much as she did. While other people may not give a damn, my mother was the one that I discussed and debated politics with and laughed and cried with.
I encouraged her and she encouraged me. Two years ago, she was laid off her job. She was like I dont know what to do. I was finishing my degree at the time, and was like, "Let's get our degrees together." So we did. So last May, we did just that. We graduated college together.
So, for two people so connected here on earth, will the bond continue? Yes. My mom also lost her mom the same way, but she never let that bond die. I never knew how similar my life would be to hers until now. But it is. People think that I would have been incapacitated by her death. But, nobody understands shes always tried to prepare me for an early death, as her grandmother and mother passed away early, she would probably do so as well. And all of that talk, was necessary.
So,knowing that I may die early as well, I guess I cant stop living right now. I hope to get married and have children eventually. I think Im going to travel more, and simply take life more seriously. I know Im not the only one without a mom out there and its probably one of the most lonely feeling. But I have my dad, and a number of mothers around me. She gave them to me and Im grateful.
So, anyway, life is going to continue, taking some moments to cry and to reflect. But life can't stop, as it seems life is short and its important to have the right people in our lives, fulfilling sources of happiness, and long term vision. Her death as only enforced this.
Continuing Education is Key in Shytty Times
As of 2007, I've earned a BA in History and a Paralegal Studies Certificate from Montclair State University. I am continuing my education at Rutgers University; I'm currently attending Rutgers Business School. I hope to eventually earn a Master of Public Administration and Master of Business Administration. I'm going to try to go to Law School eventually. Everything is this world is possible. Don't let age or any obstacles stop your dreams.
By the way, I believe that it's never too late to finish what you start. I was on the nine year plan, but I did it. If you made bad grades, just go to Community College and fix your GPA. You can do it!!! I just think that there's too many people walking around thinking that they're not smart enough, when really they just didn't have the right focus the first time around. If you really want to go back, you should. One course at a community college is about four hundred dollars and you can even do a payment plan. You can do it. If you need encouragement and advise, just write me.
Overgrown Boys Irritate Me (The Signs That You Need to Grow The EFF Up
1. You just can't seem to understand why every woman you meet feels a need to tell you off.
2. You've heard over and over gain, how lazy you are but you don't do anything to fix it.
3. You go to a restaurant, church, party and there you are playing with your cell phone.
4. Your mom is the only woman that seems to tolerate you.
5. You have excuses why you don't pay your bills (You ponder, wWhy does there have to be credit scores?).
6. You ask women to buy you things, take you places (Hell nah).
7. You never take responsibility; you blame everybody but yourself for your actions.
8. You show up to every event in jeans, durag or something else unappropriate.
9. You haven't finished anything you started.
10. The women that tolerate you act simple and play themselves, but the ones that are a little too smart, leave your azz with the quickness.
11. You have big dreams, but no plans.
12. Your remaining friends are just as dumb as you; nobody has their shyt together. The brother that does have his shyt together, doesn't associate with you any more. Maybe bc, you are lazy, irresponsible, or smoking weed or all of the above.
It's time to grow the eff up and stop being your own worst enemy. I know so many guys that get in their own way, and are too afraid to try, too afraid to fail. I'm sick of it. Stop being a burden on society and start building a healthy society with men that are about things, being good husbands, good workers, good fathers, good friends. Don't give up on growing up; you can't stay 18 the rest of your life.
1. Stop focusing on getting sex and actually get a skill that pays; money and success are better aphrodisiac than any dude with some vulgar nickname.
2. Start focusing on paying bills and saving money, rather than spending it on shyt that you don't need to get respect from guys and attention from girls. They don't really care about you anyway.
3. Start looking at the things you do to the people in your life. Are you taking your mothers money? Are you taking women's money? Are you understanding that a monthly child support isn't enough to support a child? Stop the selfishness and promiscuity; focus on being grown azz men that care about something other than sex and getting over on people.
4. Learn some class. Put away the phone and take an interest in the people that are with. Take off the hats, put on some dress clothes. Eat properly and make conversation.
5. Its time to grow the eff up.
One Happy Girl
From one happy lady, I don't know what to say. I have so many things to cry about right now, but I'm happy. I pray that I make my mother proud with the woman I'm becoming. I also try to keep myself happy, too. I guess, Im not perfect, but I hope that that somewhere there is a happy medium. I dreamt of her last night, and I woke up so happy. As if there is confirmation that there is a God and that there is a good place that some of us go when we live honestly.
I dont know what to say I'm so fortunate for all the good things, that I can't think of what I'm missing. I'm thankful for God, as that verse is true: "Those who mourn will be comforted." And he has blessed me. Thank you God, for letting me have a mother that was actually perfect; because she was real, because she was a sister that I never had and the best friend that I probably will have again. I hope that I am the same sort of mother. Thank you for giving me her face, her voice, and a lot of the good parts. Although you never saw my wedding or see my future kids, I know, youre with me. You taught me how to read before I was three years old. And I am thankful for all of your support; even in the crazy things I've thought about doing.
I dont know who I'm going to end of with, or how my life will turn out. However, Im so grateful for the support of a few people that made those days that could have been lonely, not lonely. I'm so happy for this feeling. I hope that this time next year will be better and the life Im rebuilding right now with out my mothers physical pressence will be something fufillling and honorable. It is His grace, that I'm here today. I feel the arms of the Lord around my family, and what could have been devastating, has been bearable, through faith, love, and tears. Today, I can still smile, because there is a God that loves me. God bless everybody.
