BlackDragon2k's Blog

Hello ladies and gentlemen this is you boy SYN aka So Syncere aka The New Hitch lol Lately I know if you guys have read my profile of a little bit about myself; I have been getting alot of questions on relationships.... It seems funny that recently alot of people asked me this simple question or should I say questions that equate to the same whole question:

WHAT ARE SOME WAYS TO MAINTAIN YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER?

That being said here I bring today from the good old BOOK OF SYNCERE MY TOP 10 RELATIONSHIP TIPS AND TRICKS:

1. Act Out of Character.

Couples develop a particular dynamic: the way they relate to each other that repeats itself over and over. If you break that pattern and act against type -- in a positive way -- you inject new life into the relationship. For example, if you always get angry at your guy when he doesn't follow through on some chore, try addressing him in a nicer, more friendly tone, then thank him when he does a good job. It works every time.

2. Get in Touch a Lot.

No doubt you hug and kiss each other while some can take it further and just get their freak on in the middle of a Fifth Saks Ave.. But simple acts like stroking his arm while you're watching TV and taking his hand when you're walking down the street are also ways to bond. Touching your partner throughout the day triggers your feel-good hormones, which reinforces your affection and makes you feel closer on an instinctive level.

3. Take Turns Talking.

To make sure you both get a chance to state what's on your mind during a disagreement -- and get your points across -- alternate playing reflective therapist, where one listens while the other talks. Never let the conversation end up being a one way bitch session as well. Both of you will manage to get out this conversation is a bunch of ok's, yeah's and umm hmm's.....

4. Find the Intersection.

When making decisions together, try to find common ground. Compromise is the key here. You each should write down exactly what you want. Let's say you're angling for a vacation in San Pedro to see the sights and hit up the cool shops and restaurants, while he wants a tropical getaway where he can veg out by the pool and sip drinks with umbrellas in the glass. Now that your desires are clearly laid out on paper, you can pick a place that will satisfy both your needs. A cool city, a little sun,yet exotic... how about Thailand?

5. Be More Positive Than Negative.

There's a more effective way to air grievances than to file an angry complaint. Think about it; its always easier to think with the glass half empty than looking at the glass half full. Sandwich your negative comment between two positives. If you want to complain about how he's always late, for example, try something like "You know, I love that you're so laid-back and easygoing, but it really bothers me when you show up so late. I'm sure you can still be the fun guy I adore and also be on time."

6. Echo Each Other.

When you and your man are having a serious relationship talk, it's easy to get so caught up in how you want to respond that you're not really listening to what's being said. That's why it's important for both of you to repeat each other: so you know you've been heard and you feel understood. Believe it or not this works very much 100 percent of the time, thus you are listening instead of just hearing them.

7. Take a Time-Out.

Neither of you is perfect, and the quirks you both have are here to stay. So rather than let those annoying traits work your last nerve, try to get in touch with the upside of those particular flaws, even if it's not immediately recognizable. Instead of getting annoyed when he starts screaming at the TV, for example, remind yourself how much you love his passion. Or if his shyness with new people bugs you, think about how refreshing it is to be with a chill, genuine guy rather than a blowhard who needs to chat with everyone in the room.

8. Have His Back.

You might not agree with your guy when he's had a riff with a friend or he thinks his boss is being unfair, but you should always be on his side... Come on, everybody needs a Ride or Die Chick..... and vice versa. Otherwise, you'll both feel like you can't count on each other. That doesn't mean you have to take the "you're so right" route all the time. Just hear him out, and let him know that you'll support him no matter what.

9. Spend a Little Money on Each Other. (And I Mean a Little)

You don't have to wait for a special occasion to give small presents to show your love and affection. In fact, gifts are more fun -- and meaningful -- when they're not expected. Try to get into the habit of exchanging sweet tokens of appreciation for no particular reason. Don't go and blow your paycheck though. It's not about being extravagant, especially if you work at McDonalds or live with your parents OR you are spoiled and get anything you want for that matter; it's just a way of showing that you really get -- and think about -- each other. Maybe you buy him a tee of his favorite band that you saw on sale or he gets you a pair of pajamas in your favorite color. Take this for example: 1 rose can mean alot more than a dozen if you put the effort into what that rose means. Add a poem or a memory that serves the purpose of that rose. Get what I am saying here? Simple goes alot further than extravagant.

10. Be a Good Date.

Face it, no one can stay fascinating forever. After being together for a while, the initial excitement fades, and your guy can start to get kind of boring sometimes. Guys, somebody else catching your eye; looks like you in the same boat too! Hey, don't think you're off the hook -- if you're feeling a little ho-hum about him, the feeling is likely mutual! To combat the blahs, take turns coming up with an interesting date idea every month. Keep the time and details to yourself, and try to think outside the box -- dinner and a movie is not exactly innovative. An awesome concert or a picnic by the lake, for example, is a much more spontaneous treat... Advice by Chrishaun Baldwin aka So Syncere