CGNitty's Blog

Are u kidding me? Jay Z cries about Chris Brown performing at the BET Awards and actually was snubbed? I am not beyond words I just got a lot to say about that.

The thing is I know that there are many Hova fans who admire his might in this industry. Being a self-made millionaire coming from his upbringings is truely remarkable and comendable. But tell me homi really didn't give another black artist trying to come back from something negative that, being his young age, needs to be repaired in his life rather than repromanded by some1 who has made his career on guns, drugs and violence. Especially one who performs a song on the very same night calling for more violence (D.O.A.).

Let's not forget Jay's resume:

He used his deceased mentors name, beef, and almost every hot mc's lyrics to get to his place in rap lore.

Dissed the only rapper (Jaz-O) that gave him a chance at the business once he got to the top. 

He asked that producers raise the price of their respective tracks so that he may corner the market form talented underprivledged artist who can't afford it.

He did a tour w/ an accused child pornographer and rapist (R. Kelly) only to disinvolve himself w/ after his aire was raised on unrelated concert issues.

He turned his back on Dame Dash the one man who helped him create as well as run Roc-A-Fella Records.

He quietly put the kabosh on Nas's performance of Ether.

So this truely doesn't surprise me but does disappoint me in the fact that if he wanted to make a statement in regards to abuse he didn't have to walk on a kid who made a mistake to cross that road. Y not do a duet w/ wifey Beyonce called 'We Never Fight' or something? Maybe start a foundation for abused women or apeak against abuse.

If ne one should be takin a stance against ne thing shouldn't it be Beyonce? Wasn't it reported that Jay and Rhi Rhi had an alleged affair during his courting of Beyonce? B come on now u ain't trippin that this nig Hov playin soap box preacher over the tramp u had to write lyrics about?

Jay u DEAD WRONG!!!

Hey Friends, The other day I logged in to take care of my daily updates to my page and check my page log as usual. I came across a lady who had some crazy views and expressed to me that it was shared by many of u women. I've paste the conversation we had through notes for u to form your own opinion to share with me and maybe even her.... Now I must admit, I did ask for her opinion and this is what was transcribed....

------ Original note ------

From: CGNitty To: lisaswan Subject: U visited and said.... I cu stopped by my page and didn't even send me an invite. I guess I ain't impressive enough. I gotta step the game up. lol------
From: lisaswan To: CGNitty Subject: Re: U visited and said.... no I just read your page... no need to step up anything for me. ------
From: CGNitty To: lisaswan Don't know how to take that reply but ok. ------
From: lisaswan To: CGNitty ok I meant... u r sexy and all, but after reading your page i determined that we dont have much in common so i kept movin... but bu r a cutie so u dont need to step your game up. i'm sure there are many females on here looking for u. ------
From: CGNitty To: lisaswan Okay then. In my quest to be the ultimate man I have to ask what was it that dissuaded u? I'm in constant evaluation and upgrading to become that aspired Alpha Male. I am curious to know your feelings. ------
From: lisaswan To: CGNitty well since you asked... My first impression was that you seem a little too young (for me)- still green. I might have enjoyed the hip-hop appeal 15 years ago... not that your music is not good- from the little bit i heard. you are actually alright. it just seems geared for the under 21 something club. I was not impressed with anything you said - at all. So basically I did not enjoy the whole right side of your page. The only thing I was impressed with that you belonged to the autism group. ------
From: CGNitty To: lisaswan Lol... well I respect your opinion. It is just that. Did u even bother to read any of my Blogs. I am a writer first, entertainer last. My music has been a dream of mine since I was 12 years old so 15 years ago doesn't quite cover my span in the biz. I'm ## sweetie and I did find a few of your assumptions a bit stereo-typical and offensive. But I did ask for your view. I am not just an artist and if u had "read" the whole right side of my page then u would have noticed the letters CEO. I've been in the biz for years working with the likes of George Daniels, Kenard Gibbs, spent about 8 years working with Time Publishing and Vibe Ventures (Publishers of Vibe Magazine) and am a member of ASCAP. This is a web page purposely implemented as entertainment. U may be taking it a bit too serious. When u take your nose out of the air in looking down on one u will smell the street. I am the street and am proud of it! As u see, on the right side of my page, I have over 900 friends that don't mind that side. U take care.... ------
From: lisaswan To: CGNitty again... just my opinion, but I dont know too many women in their 30's that are impressed by rappers from the projects.

From: CGNitty To: lisaswan u don't know many women then!!! ;o------end note ------

WOW!!! To each his own but if this is the general consensus of most women than u finally undersatand y I'm still single and don't trust the quality of falling in love. Please someone tell Nitty it aint so.... Or r u all member Lisaswan? I'd like it if u told Lisa how u felt.... Leave me a response to this...

You open the door to your home welcomed by a soft, warm, dim red light. A small letter lay attached to the closet with your favorite scent for a man. Being as gentle as you are, you carefully sepeated from the door. It reads....

#1. Totally undress.

#2. Open the closet.

#3. Put these on.

With that, no more words are left on the note. You place the note on the floor and proceed to steps 1 and 2 anticipating a world of glory.

Opening the closet with dancing eyes you follow a full length mink to the floor, finished by the pair of red pumps you fancied at Macy's. You then slide on the pumps, yes a perfect fit. Now rushing to caress your smooth, beautiful, uncloaked and cooled skin u whisk, the coat around your elegant frame. As u slide your arm through the right sleeve your delicate hand encounters another note....

#4. There is a remote in the pocket, press play.

You do so and the one love song u feel the world can't live without surrounds the room. "Ooooh!", you softly whisper as if an ice cube had just went trickling down your spine.

#5. Proceed to the couch.

As you oblige you notice a feeling of gliding under your graceful steps.... rose petals (white and red) carpet your entrance. Reaching the requested destination a center-piece of one lone candle very chilled bottle of champagne and flute glass seem to rhythmically move as one, puppeteer-ed by the flickering light of the wicks flame. Next to which lies a red scarf...

#6. Take in all that there is to see around you.

#7. After you have positions yourself firmly on the couch cloak your eyes with the scarf.

Following these next directions you try to relax your, still mink draped & blindfolded body. Before fully letting go of your inhibitions a warm intense touch illuminates your body. Making the fine hairs which rest on the back of your neck excitingly rise. You reach out but nothing is felt to satisfy your curiousness. Then another touch tempts your already poised appetite for the mystery gliding from your neck down to your ankle. Your left foot is slowly and gently risen as if by an angel. This then is followed by a warm, wet, tickling sensation that covets every sexy, painted toe on both pampered feet. This has blossomed your most hidden eroticism. The sensation has slowly worked it's way up to your most precious and treasured jewel. Once very familiar is now a feeling which introduces a never before felt pleasure.

After a brief separation of time between touch your head is carefully lifted with your lips now tracing the rim of the flute glass u last saw on the center-piece which now embraces the champagne. The drink is finished and the bubbles rush straight to your head. This furthers your want for the touch that will familiarize you with this still unknown.

You proposition a kiss with out the slightest murmur of a word. Several quick but meaningful and provokingly placed kisses chase and tease your tongue. Cleverly designed planned to unlock your sensuality, fore with one lustful thrust opens the both of your legs like the double doors of the queens quarters.

One unanticipated motion and comfortable weight thrust and that which you traveled and carefully followed instruction for has become the present. Your Present...

Back, Forth, up, down, in and this is what it was about. You now enjoy the fact that you are still visually impaired knowing that this is your moment, your day. Forget who it is and take in who it could be. Could it be him, the one you've fantasized so much of but your morals reminded you of the ramifications. This time though, it can be whomever you want. With no words spoken and only your thoughts to complete this mystery you could do, be or have whatever you want. The notion intensifies every touch now. You can control yourself no longer. This engagement has taken you to a place only dreamed of. Your love comes roaring down like the river at the bow of it's waterfall. You lay there as you are as gentle single kisses pelt all parts of you thought to be forgotten. Then he uncloaks you, it's.....

Written by Frank Madman Nitty

If I told u the whole truth could u handle it?

Okay then, I'll try....

But what truth do u want to know?

Are u asking me the truth on where do I live instead of asking me the truth of how much longer will it be before I'm elsewhere...

Will u prefer the truth in regards to why I hustle to survive over the truth of the goals and aspirations I have for my future....

U want the truth pertaining to how far accomplished I am in academics not pondering the truth of what my street smarts can provide...

Should I give u the truth on how I'm from the projects and harmed others or the truth about how I would protect you from harm with my last breath...

Would u like to know the truth about how much money I got or possibly the truth about how much love I can give u...

The truth about where I work or the truth about what lengths I would take to care for u...

The truth about what kind of whip I steer or the truth about the places I will go for the sake of u...

Do u need to know the truth of how many girls I have sexed as opposed to knowing the truth of the special few I cherished...

Are u inquiring about the truth on if I have kids in clarity to the truth of can I be a family man...

Want to know the truth about how I wanted to do u from the first moment I saw u and or the truth of how I want to get to know everything about u know matter the what...

Well here are some truths I think u should know...

My Mom and Dad were never good role models for relationships so I'm still learning how to truly love someone.

The truth is my two daughters are the most important people in my life right now and I'm hoping to find that special someone I can love as much.

The truth is I like to dress nice and look good for the public even when my money ain't that right with no intent to deceive or mislead u.

The truth is I wish I could pick u up in something nice when u want but at this moment I'll try to get u where u need to be.

Honestly speaking I love to see the smile on your face inspiring me to do all that I am capable of to ensure your smiles longevity.

Truthfully I am dying to one day be able to take care of u like I know u deserve to be taken care of.

Another truth is I could very well be the man u have been looking for all this time.

Now tell the truth, if I'm standing at a bus stop do u even care about these truths?

Or does the truth sound better from the passenger side of my auto?

I'll always give the truth when I find out which truth u would like.

I remember as a lil boy my mom would always tell me she loved me. Everyday she would call me her handsome son. She would often tell others how smart and gifted her son was then. When I did well in school or when I would out dance and sing all of my family and friends she was there rooting. It's so significant now that I am older because I realize how young a woman she was at 16. Significant because I couldn't fathom at age 16 having a child or knowing how to love it. At that age all I wanna to do is play ball hang out with my homi's and juice the lil hot girls in my projects. Momma always told me I was too young to know what love was about, and that, I think, still holds true to me.

My dad would tell me he loved me all the time, when he and mom split. Every time he would get a few dollars or get another job (not often enough) he would call or come see me and my lil sis and before it was all said and done, pronounce his love for us. And then commence to telling us of his love for my mother (he knew we had big mouths). But, never-the-less, we could always count on those three words.

I noticed though that the older I got the less I heard those words. When I was off to Highschool and probably needed to hear it more I noticed the change. It was a time when my mom was getting lonely, looking for a significant other and feeling the pressures of being a 'single' parent mom of 2. Now I can almost understand how to her it could have been viewed as a curse. I mean as a man myself I know that we tend to extend our hand to the female with less baggage. However dumb that may be perceived, it is what it is! Maybe it's fear of responsibility or the urban legend of the baby daddy blues. I dunno!!! But my Grandma always taught me to be understanding, so that I am.

"Momma, I hit a three at the buzzard today!" "Mmmm hmmm, that's good", was the phrase I heard often. "I got 2 sacks and an interception and we won!" "Mmmm hmmm, that's real good." "I love you ma." "Mmmm hmmm, thank you baby!" That three word phrase had lost it's job & been replaced. And if I messed up I heard all kinds of phrases. Some of the words had 3 and 4 letters, but no 'love'. The only time I got any emotion out of my moms was mostly from anger. That's when I started acting out in school and in the hood and labeled a problem child. But moms is payin' attention to me now.

In fact, the only time I ever heard 'I love you' is when the lil ones of the family would visit. Was this the problem? Did me and my sister simply out grow the affection. Dad had lessened his visits (fighting a few demons of his own) so that occasional esteem booster had all but disappeared. My sister & I were never taught to say 'I love you' to one another so that was a wash. Grandma would say it often but at that age who wanted to go hang at granny's.

So how could we fill this void? I fell in love with every girl that paid attention to me(I still do that!). The one who said she loved me became my "girl". My sister filled her void at the age of 15 with her first child Antionette. I waited a whole year later (17) along with my girl at the time and had Ebony. I wonder if mom would have kept telling us how she loved us like she did when we were her babies would we have rushed to have our own?

The only thing that matters now is that I make sure I tell my kids I love them as much as possible! And though she won't say it, I will always love my mom and sister and they will always love me. And my dad still loves me as he watches over me from above. You should pronounce loudly today that what which might not be acknowledged tomorrow.

I guess what I'm trying to convey is that that small phrase, 'I love you', can go a long way towards not just any kid but any persons self-esteem and is highly motivational. When these words are meant from the heart of the bearer, it can truly uplift a spirit and rejuvenate a soul. It should be said often and never sparingly. When at wits-end with that one you care so much for, right when you're about to explode, close your eyes and replace every unkind word you think of with that phrase and watch how life changes.

It's been one....