It was time.
I didn’t know where I was going, how I was going to get there
or if I had enough to survive wherever I ended up.
All I knew, is it was time to go.
Years of frustration, years of looking the other way, years of turning the other cheek
and today was the day that I decided there would be no more.
No more would love be used as an excuse to subject myself to pain I don’t deserve.
There wouldn’t be another go-round of:
“I hate you / I love you / I hate you again… only to be in bed with you later…”
The ride stops here.
I expect it; to hear the apologies
to see the eyes and to have the desire to work it out.
The problem is, it never works out.
And I don’t have any more time to invest in a situation that hasn’t grown or progressed in years.
There has been no forward movement;
In fact I feel that I’ve regressed significantly while dealing with the heaviness of this relationship.
Nothing left to talk about. The evaluations are over. Analysis complete.
This. Is. No. Good.
I never said I don't love you.
On the contrary, my heart is filled with more love for you than anyone in my life at this time.
Well, I take that back – there is one person I love more.
Which is why Me and Self aren’t waiting to hear what you have to say next,
or to see what comes next.
Me and Self are not simply throwing a fit to try to get your attention in hopes to inspire you to change.
This is real love. This is real, Love.
The “Love You, but Love Myself More, Goodbye.”
(Dedicated to the man or woman having to make difficult decisions in matters of the heart)