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personal message
" Resolutions for the Black Woman" 1.Love, Love, Love Yourself.
There`s only one You, So Love You to death. 2.Stop playing the
victim. Martyrdom is totally unnecessary for todays Black Woman,
Your First allegiance is to yourself, without a strong sense of
self, there is no way that you can tackle the ups and downs of a
relationship or the rigors of motherhood (if you so choose) 3.Stop
settling for less. A piece of man is definitely not better than a
whole, healthy man. Your desperation is showing 4.Stop trying to be
a savior. If a man doesn`t have his head together and is on the
skids, it is not up to you to try to save him. You are neither his
mother nor his therapist. Let him go and move on. Men like this
will bring you down if you aren`t careful. 5.Learn to exhale
between relationships. In other words ...no transitional lovers.
Someone always ends up being hurt and it could be you.. again, or
that poor man. Neither one of you deserves to be hurt or used. Give
yourself some down time. 6.Learn the differance between being alone
and being lonely. Being alone is by choice and loneliness is only
temporary. Get out and enjoy yourself. Wallowing in loneliness can
often make women desperate for attention and lead them into
unhealthy relationships . 7.Don`t allow any man to validate you.
Allowing any man to define you as a woman leaves you open to being
controlled and eventually abused. Why give a man that type of power
over you ? Now, do you really want to be the kind of woman who
thinks that her life is not complete unless she has a man in it...
any man ?Where`s your self- respect? 8.Blessed is the child that
has Her Own.Handle your business educationally and financially.
Generally,needy,uneducated women tend to attract men of the lowest
character . 9.Small sacrifices now lead to bigger rewards later.
Don`t let Good Sex Sway You. Sure,He may rock your boat like no
other man has ever done,but don`t let the sex cloud your
judgement.If he treats you like crap, or like a convenient booty
call,or just add you to his harem,then ,eventually you may come to
resent him with the same passion you displayed when he was between
your legs.Now, if that`s all you want,and that`s all you think
you`re worth and willing to settle for,then be honest and protect
yourself. If you play,you will definately pay. Don`t confuse lust
with love. And no fair trying to trap him with a pregnancy neither
of you wants.That`s dirty pool. And why should an innocent child
pay for your stupidity.After all, You picked him. 10.Don`t try to
buy a man`s affection. In the long run,not only will you lose
him,but also you will lose your self respect and any smidgen of
respect he may have had for you.Are you that desperate? Any
self-respecting man will never allow himself to be kept. Kept
meaning, letting him move into your place, paying his car note,
allowing him to use your credit,etc. 11.Stop trying to change Men.
Men will usually tell you who they are if you really listen to
them. So try less talking and do more listening and you will most
likely,save yourself from trouble. 12.Stay away from unavailable
men. If he`s married, separated, having problems with his
baby/babies mama/mamas, not ready for commitment, not willing to
commit, etc. he is off limits..Now if you thrive on drama, then, By
all means, go right ahead.Some women are made like that. 13. Love
doesn`t Hurt. Women who say that they love physical or verbal abuse
from their mates have some serious emotional issues and will
continue to `make up excuses until they get the help they need.
Don`t become a statistic.The life you save may be your own.
14.Don`t compromise your moral value.Even if you don`t consider
yourself a particularly religious person,promiscuity will take a
toll on your self-respect and even your health,in the long
run.Sleeping around with men who don`t have your best interest at
heart tends to chip away at the very essence of you.Listen to your
instincts.They will never lead you wrong. 15.Respect is
reciprocal.If you want respect then give respect,especially toward
your mate. If you lash out anger,frustration or whatever,be
prepared to receive the same in return.Even the most loving gentle
man can take only so much of his woman`s funky attitude. 16.Keep
your personal business between you and your man.Use extreme
discretion whenever you are tempted to discuss your personal
problems with family,friends,etc.Many relationships have been
broken up due to outsiders putting their two cents in where it did
not belong..Keep that mouth zipped. 17.Don`t advertise your
man.Whether he is "da bomb" in the bedroom or a blessing sent down
from heaven.Try to keep to yourself. Actions speak louder than
words. Most women can pick up on this just by being around you and
yours. Why? Because you are as happy and content as a kitten with a
saucer of warm milk. It will definately show. Now theres nothing
wrong with a little bragging about your man.But keep it low key. No
sense in irritating those unscrupulous women who will try to "test
your man" and/or lure him away (as if they could). So , my
sisters...How about a whole new you ? Why refer yourself as
a well-bred Black Queen,if you`re carrying yourself like a low-bred
commoner?If you want to be treated as a Black Queen,then it`s time
to start displaying some Queenly behavior and sporting a whole new
attitude.If you want to be treated like royalty then you must act
like royalty.It goes both ways....
my gifts
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